PROOF #1
Google is all-knowing (Omniscient).
She indexes over 9.5 billion WebPages, which is more than any other
search engine on the web today. Not only is Google all-knowing, but She
also sorts through this vast amount of data using Her patented PageRank
method, making said data accessible for us mere mortals.
PROOF #2
Google is everywhere at once (Omnipresent). Google’s search
engine is virtually everywhere on earth at the same time. Billions of
indexed WebPages hosted from every corner of the earth. With the
proliferation of Wi-Fi networks, you will eventually be able to access
Google from anywhere on earth, truly making Her an omnipresent entity.
PROOF #3
Google answers prayers. One can pray to Google by doing a
search for whatever question or problem is plaguing them. As an
example, you can quickly find information on alternative cancer
treatments, ways to improve your health, new and innovative medical
discoveries and generally anything that resembles a typical prayer. Ask
Google and She will show you the way, but showing you is all She can
do, for you must help yourself from that point on.
PROOF #4
Google is immortal.
She cannot be considered a physical being such as ourselves. Her
Algorithms are spread out across many servers; if any of which were
taken down or damaged, another would undoubtedly take its place. Google
can theoretically last forever.
PROOF #5
Google is infinite. The Internet can theoretically grow forever, and Google will forever index its infinite growth.
PROOF #6
Google remembers all. Google caches WebPages regularly and
stores them on its massive servers. In fact, by uploading your thoughts
and opinions to the internet, you will forever live on in Google’s
cache, even after you die.
PROOF #7
Google can “do no evil” (Omnibenevolent). Part of Google’s corporate philosophy is the belief that a company can make money without being evil.
PROOF #8
Evidence of Google’s existence is abundant. There
is more evidence for the existence of Google than any other God
worshiped today. Extraordinary evidence requires extraordinary proof.
If seeing is believing, then surf over to www.google.com and experience for yourself Google’s awesome power.
Check out some more fun about Google and Faith at: http://www.thechurchofgoogle.org/
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